7 Strategies Unrepresented Buyers MUST Know When Working with Listing Agents| Ep. 23
7 Strategies for Dealing with Listing Agents Who Refuse to Work with Unrepresented Buyers
Growing up, my mom always taught me the importance of standing up to bullies, and I think that has a huge part to play in why I'm doing what I'm doing now as the real estate agent gone rogue who is teaching home buyers how to represent themselves without hiring a buyer's agent.
I do this because I have seen time and time again the way that the traditional real estate system is set up to bully buyers, especially into participation in a system that is stacked against them.
This week I was talking with a home buyer that is going unrepresented (or a DIY home buyer), and she found a property that she really liked. She called the listing agent to set up a time to tour the property and the listing agent just flat out said, "Nope, I don't work with unrepresented buyers, so you're going to have to find a buyer's agent and I'd be more than happy to refer you to somebody in my office and then they can schedule the showing."
Of course, this lady was just shocked by it. Sadly, I'm not surprised because I've heard this story time and time again now. She's just wondering, "What do I do and why am I being forced to participate in hiring an agent when I don't want one? Is it a legal requirement that I have to have an agent in order to buy a home?"
The answer to that is no—free market allows you to enter in as a self-represented or unrepresented home buyer. That's a perfectly legitimate legal way to participate in the market.
But unfortunately, too many realtors, brokers, and brokerages are trying to stack the deck against home buyers and bar them from participation. So while it is your legal right, there are some systemic issues here. That's really what I want to address in this podcast, as well as give you seven strategies for pushing past a listing agent that does not want to cooperate or work with you as an unrepresented home buyer.
About Me
If you're new here, my name is Nick. I am the host of the DIY Home Buyer podcast that you're listening to. I also have the DIY homebuyer community on School. It's free for now, but it won't be free forever. So do be sure to join that if you're enjoying the show.
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I've had some agents that have listened to my show, and I'll tell you this—they're not excited about what I'm doing or the content that I'm creating. So I've gotten some bad reviews, and it just goes a long, long ways in terms of discovery and my own personal encouragement if you would leave a review or a comment or just something positive.
Forms of Representation
Let's start by talking about what are the three forms of representation. What are the valid ways to participate as a home buyer?
1. Hiring a Buyer's Agent
The most common and traditional way is by hiring your own buyer's agent. For many people, this is just sort of the default mode: "I'm going to buy a home, I'll hire a buyer's agent."
It wasn't a big decision for many people for a long time, because buyer's agents would use this line of, "Well, it's a free service to you. You don't pay me, the seller pays me." That wasn't exactly true, which led to the lawsuits in 2021 that finally got settled in 2024, and a bunch of rule changes where now buyer agents are having to discuss compensation with their clients before actually looking at homes.
This is causing home buyers to wake up to the fact that their buyer's agent is financially incentivized for them to spend more money and as quickly as possible because they only get paid when they actually close on a home. The amount they get paid is proportional to how expensive of a home they buy.
Why would you want to hire somebody to represent your interests, whose financial interests are not aligned with your own? That's the misalignment that many home buyers are waking up to and starting to think, "What are my other options?"
2. Dual Agency
Dual agency is where you have one agent that is representing both the seller and the buyer. But the problem is that what the seller wants and what the buyer wants are opposed to one another. So how do you have one person representing two people who have opposing desires?
It's like having one chef that's trying to cook a meal for somebody who's a vegan and somebody who's a carnivore. It's a next to impossible task. What it does is it neutralizes that agent so that really they're just facilitating the transaction.
I don't recommend anybody participate in a dual agency relationship. A lot of states have already made legal moves to ban dual agency (they call it something else like a "transaction agent"). Just stay away from anything where you have one person that is neutralized because they're trying to mediate or represent the interests of two opposed parties.
3. DIY Home Buying (Unrepresented)
The third and perfectly legitimate way of representation—the one that I advocate for—is DIY home buying. On your paperwork, it'll look like you're an "unrepresented buyer."
Side note: It speaks to how much agents and the National Association of Realtors have influenced these documents that they call you "unrepresented." It's like, "No, I am represented. I'm represented by me, and that's enough."
As an unrepresented buyer, you need to recognize that most of the time you're going to be dealing with sellers through their listing agent. That listing agent does not work for you. They do not represent you. They do not have your interests at heart.
Based upon the terms of their agreement with their seller, they are only and exclusively looking out for the seller's best interests. You need to be aware of that. But that is actually okay. You don't need to be intimidated by that because it just means that instead of talking directly to the seller, you're talking to somebody that they have hired to be their voice and be their face.
What does that listing agent owe you? They should treat you with excellent customer service. You are about to make a several hundred thousand dollar (if not million-plus dollar) purchase. They better treat you amazingly on behalf of their client. If you're selling anything that's hundreds of thousands of dollars, you would want to make sure that customers receive excellent customer service.
The listing agent owes you honesty about the condition of the home, about anything that can be known about the home that the seller knows or that they know. They have to disclose those things, so you can ask them anything you want about the condition of the property or the surrounding area. If they know the answers, they've got to tell you.
The thing that they can't do is they can't do anything that would be of a financial detriment to their seller. So if the house is listed at, let's say, $700,000, but they know that the seller would probably take $675,000, they can't say, "Hey, I bet you could get it for $675,000."
Or if you don't know what contingencies to include, they can't tell you, "Hey, when you write your offer, make sure that you include an inspection contingency," because that's not in the seller's best interests financially.
Understanding Listing Agent Motivations
Assuming now that you are an unrepresented buyer and you call a listing agent to say, "Hey, I'm really interested in this home, would love to set up a time to see it," and they say, "No." What do you do?
First and foremost, it helps to understand the listing agent's motivation:
Fear - They worry that you, as an unrepresented buyer, don't know what you're doing, will cause problems and headaches, back out at the last minute, and make their life miserable. They also worry about liabilities if they're not careful about boundaries.
Greed - In states where dual agency is allowed, an agent stands to make twice as much if they represent both you and the seller. There's also a long-term incentive for them professionally to make it as hard as possible for unrepresented buyers to participate in the market.
You're trying to overcome two of the strongest human emotions—fear and greed—that are driving many listing agents when they say they will not work with an unrepresented buyer.
Seven Strategies to Push Past Listing Agent Resistance
1. Own the Pushback
Don't be surprised by it. Be pleasantly surprised when you find a listing agent who is happy and eager to work with you in service of their client.
Let them know, "Hey, I'm good. I've got this. I'm happy to represent myself. I've been educated on the process. I'm part of a community where I'm learning how to do all of this. I've taken a course. I'm good."
You can also let them know, "I have done my due diligence here. I am pre-approved. I'm happy to sign a disclosure that acknowledges that you represent the seller and that I am the unrepresented buyer. Whatever you need, I'm happy to do it."
2. Out-Prepare Them
Try to know more about the house and the neighborhood than they do. If they push back as you're trying to schedule, you can say, "I've looked around this neighborhood for a long time, and I know that this other house hit the market and sold within seven days. I don't want to miss out on this opportunity."
Being able to mention certain features about the home that really appeal to you or make it uniquely well-suited to you shows that you have prepared and are organized. The listing agent will respect that because their main concern is that they don't want to waste their time or the seller's time.
3. Hit Them with Some Swagger
Sometimes you come in overly polite, but there's also a place for some swagger where you set the terms. "Hey, there are a lot of homes that I'm wanting to see. Everything with these other agents I've talked with has gone great. This one is high up on my list, so let's make it happen."
Just keep pushing, not in an arrogant or rude way, but with confidence: "I hear you. You don't like working with unrepresented buyers, but I'm not like most of the unrepresented buyers you've worked with. I'm educated, I'm competent, I'm confident that I can do this."
4. Lock Down Your Lips
Don't say too much. Keep it short and sweet. Don't give away too much about your financial position or timing needs, as the listing agent can use this information to the seller's advantage in future negotiations.
5. Flex the Rules (Know Your Rights)
When a listing agent says, "I don't work with unrepresented buyers," you can respond, "Is that in writing somewhere? Can you show me where it says that?"
Have the National Association of Realtors' own FAQ ready (around #75-77), which states that listing agents do not need to have any sort of agreement with a buyer wanting to see that agent's listings. A listing agent can always show their listings in service to their seller without needing any agreement.
If they still refuse, you can say, "Can I get the information for your managing broker or the realtor association that you're part of locally? This sounds like you're trying to force me into representation when that's not actually required."
6. Practice the Dance
Role-play these conversations to build up your confidence and overcome objections. The more practiced you are, the less shaken you'll be by any response they may have.
7. Walk Away Strong
If they really refuse to work with you, be prepared to walk away strong. You don't need to capitulate. Even if it's the perfect home, you can find a way to go directly to the seller and let them know what happened.
You can also go to the managing broker of that listing agent or the association to report the behavior if needed. Don't be bullied into working with an agent if that's not something you want to do.
Conclusion
If you implement these strategies, you shouldn't have problems getting in. I'll do future episodes about what the relationship with the listing agent looks like once you're touring a property or putting together an offer, as well as what the reasonable limitations are.
We don't want to be people that are expecting listing agents to do free work for us. We want to recognize the limitations of what they're doing in service to their seller versus when you're overstepping and asking them to take on responsibilities that you as an unrepresented buyer have chosen to take upon yourself.
That's why, as an unrepresented buyer, you should also be entitled to the savings of not having a buyer's agent or not having somebody else come in to represent you.
If you want more of this, we're well over 20 episodes now, so there's a lot of content in this podcast that you can go back and listen to. For even more, join the DIY homebuyer community on School. It's free right now, but only to the first 50 people that join.
If you want to talk about one-on-one coaching to empower you to represent yourself successfully in the home buying process, I invite that conversation as well.
Thank you all—if you haven't already, subscribe, review, and leave me a friendly comment. I reply to all those, and I'll see you in the next one.
